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One of the most mythical and misunderstood things in this world is the female image. In honor of Women's History Month, (today's the last day!) I went to Hagedorn Gallery and viewed Women's Image. To soak in the last few hours we have, take at look at this post I wrote last week:

http://blogs.creativeloafing.com/culturesurfing/2010/03/22/girls-girls-girls-hagedorn-gallery/

*Okay, this image isn't from the exhibit, but it's a good modern woman!

And the Award Goes to...

Best Nod to Fashion Royalty: Diane Kruger

Well, apparently, the cheese stands alone. And in this case, I'm the cheese. But, I care not because I believe this dress is lovely. Many have commented that it's too old school. Well, if it wasn't for that old school, we would all be at a loss. And last time I checked, when it comes to Coco Chanel, she's not old, she's a classic. To begin, the dress embraces 20s French fashion, which is nothing to be upset over. The black feathers break Kruger's gown into three distinct portions. The top and bottom portion parallel one another, while the frilly middle portion contrasts the two creating balance in its overall form. Don't listen to the critics Kruger, you've got style!

And the Award Goes to...

Bow Down to the Queen

Sexy Sans Sample Size: Queen Latifah

Queen Latifah proves that's sexy doesn't equal a size two. Gown's high points: jeweled shoulder strap, sweeping bust line with matching jewels, soft pinkish/lavender color. The dress alone is a heavy-hitter, but add to that her glowing skin, good hair, and dazzling makeup, and what do you have? This Queen rules the red carpet.

And the Award Goes to...

Hottest Grandma: Dame Helen Mirren

A. Mirren doesn't look like a Grandmother. B. This is not an insult. This dame is a fox. Somehow she manages to balance elegance, a hint of sexy, and still be age appropriate. Truth is, most young women don't have this much style and beauty in their little pinkie. As far as the dress goes, it really is something. Between the sparkling tool over the dress's base and the sheer sleeves, Mirren takes British sophistication to a whole new level. Whatever her secret is, it's definitely working!

And the Award Goes To....

Kathryn Bigelow

Sometimes it has little to do with the fashion, and more to do with the accomplishment.

In the 82 years of the Academy, this year, 2010, is the first time a woman has won BEST DIRECTOR.

This beautiful lady, James Cameron's ex, put him to shame with her win for The Hurt Locker.

So, was it the most stunning dress of the evening. No, but she could have worn a potato sack and the night still belonged to her. It belonged to all women who ever had big dream. Her win is a win for all womankind, that we can achieve, that we can triumph, and we can do it all!

Congratulations, Kathryn Bigelow!

Ladies: Take a Cue from Ms. Sidebe

If forty is the new 20, then some of these ladies aren't even born yet. Remember, you gotta crawl before you walk. That being said, ladies where is your confidence?

Miley, Hannah, whoever you are, you're practically a zillionaire, so act like it. That doesn't mean act like a snotty bitch, but we encourage you to stand up straight, hold those shoulders back, and stick out those ta-ta's. And if it was that your dress was too tight and you were afraid a ta was going to pop out, go a size larger. What does that put you in, a double zero? I heard someone say what a great a figure she has. Of course she has a perfect figure! She's 17! But really, Miley, you are a adorable, talented, and (from the interviews I've seen) a genuine person. So walk that carpet with some confidence girl!

Oh, Kristen, Kristen. We get it, your dark, beautiful, nobody gets you, and you just want to be left alone. Well, you might be in the wrong business. The tragedy is many people don't know how good you really are. Your talented. The Cake Eaters was an excellent movie that didn't get near the credit it should have. And besides the fact that we aren't clear if you like people at all, you're really something. So stop acting so socially awkward. That tortured artist thing is so 1990's.

To Kristen and Miley:

Take a page from Gabourey Sidibe's book. Man, that's one charismatic babe. Never once on camera did I see this brazen, new talent slump over, look bored, or uninterested in being there. Young talent in Hollywood, pay attention to this force because you'll all be reckoning with her for years to come.

Oscar Night: super messes

Super Messes

In some ways, having some of these ladies on here is truly painful. Some have been on the Hollywood radar for years, some have even been considered fashion icons, and some, I've just always liked. But it's time to separate the fashion from the person. Remember, being perfect is not always possible.

1. Mariah Carey: I'm not sure the above applies to Mariah, although she has been around for quite a while. What girl around my age did not bounce around to her award winning Forever Album? Where to start? Color might be appropriate. Plain and simple, navy rarely works on the red carpet (one pass to Hilary Swank who rocked it in 2005, though it might have something to do with her perfect figure). This number has slutty bridesmaid written all over it. And what is this jewel at the hip? It's not that the color doesn't match, it's just seems out of place, like a missed price tag attached.
2. Charlize Theron: First, you are so beautiful, and so many times you have been the beacon of what is correct about the red carpet. But this is not one of those times. The fitting is perfect, the color is beautiful, but then we reach your rosebuds, our eyes never leave them. Little extra goodies like these (the dress's rosebuds, not hers) shouldn't detract our attention from the rest of this dress.
3. Maggie Gyllenhaal: At first, I hated this dress. And after four hours of seeing over and over again, it finally hit me: it's not the dress's fault, it's Maggie's stylist's fault. There's nothing wrong with the dress, necessarily. It's just NOT the correct venue. Truth is, I like the pops of color, it's almost like a canvas, and Maggie was truly stunning. It's just too casual for the biggest night of entertainment.
4. Amanda Seyfried: Another dress I instantly didn't like. First, though I have heard many say it compliments her skin, again no. I too am the color of a sheet, and no matter how many times I reach for light colors, I put them back. This is Armani Prive, quite similar to what Jennifer Lopez wore, but here's the difference: Jennifer filled out the dress, and Amanda, well didn't.
5. Zoe Saldana: I loved you long before any of these people knew who you were. I have seen Center Stage over 20 times recognizing your talent long before Hollywood caught on. But, while I love you, I did not love your dress. I get it, but, no. Much like other critics have said, you've got three distinct styles going on and they just don't meld together. Each one alone is stunning, but all together, it's just one big mess.

Again, each one of you can come back from this. Bad fashion happens to good people and just remember, 2011 is another season for second chances.

Special Dresses: Fave Five

Special Dresses

People might disagree, but Penelope Cruz, Demi Moore, Jennifer Lopez, Elizabeth Banks, and
Vera Farmiga did it right. Each one of these ladies were memorable. One of the biggest crimes this year was all the stars whose black or metallic dresses blended right into the next. I couldn't distinguish one yawn from the next. Secondly, each one of these women carried themselves with grace and confidence, which is the one thing (when lacking) that can ruin an otherwise beautiful dress.

1. Vera Farmiga: This dress was like art. First off, the brilliant pink beautifully complimented her lovely, alabaster skin. Whereas some dress designs kept eyes concentrated in one area, (Charlize Theron) Farmiga's dress design provided a fluidity that took the eye from the very top, swirled it around her frame to its bottom and then brought it back up again. I've heard some critics become quite nasty about her choice; however, I applaud someone who's not afraid to be daring.
2. Demi Moore: It's just not fair. People can say what they want about plastic surgery and all that, but Damn! She looks better now than she did 20 years ago, and we should all be so lucky. And while Demi has made some awful, awful choices in the past, she really nailed it this time. From the blush shade to the fitted bodice and cascading train, Demi somehow managed to coalesce romantic frills and sexy mama all into one little package.
3. Elizabeth Banks: Who knew that this raunchy comedian would transform into such a dazzling princess. Ms. Banks looked like a living, breathing Cinderella. From her sparkly accessories to her form fitting bodice, you just couldn't take your eyes off this breathtaking ensemble. This gown embraced a romantic feel with the flowing train, while still exuding an obvious and modern elegance.
4. Jennifer Lopez: Wow! What a body! Forty years old, and putting all those 22-year olds to shame. No one could carry off this dress as well as J-Lo. This Armani Prive hugs each and every curve all over her jaw-dropping figure. Let's just say, she would have given Marylin Monroe a run for her money. Outside of her goddess-like body, we can't ignore the sheer beauty that was this dress. The main silhouette of the dress, though beautiful, was nothing in compare to the train that peeked out at us around her bodice and then protruded from the hip pouring a fountain of fabric down to the floor. She was elegance.
5. Penelope Cruz: It's taken me nearly a decade to forgive Cruz for her role in 2001's Blow, playing the coke head wife of Johnny Depp. It might sound ridiculous now, but it really pissed me off when she ratted out the delectable Mr. Depp in the middle of a coke rage. However, this dress, this masterpiece has completely made me do a 180 over this Oscar winning actress. Some critics believed she didn't pull off the asymmetrical bustline, but I couldn't disagree more. I thought it added a stylish and necessary twist. The rich color was perfect for her tanned skin, and the flowing skirt served as a welcome contrast to her wrapped, form-fitted bodice.

Oscars 2010: All That Glitters Is Gold...

This year, it was as if stylists turned to Oscar himself for inspiration. Metallics, golds, and shimmer were the big trends for the 2010 Oscars. Some stars had style, some flare, while others we wondered, "Why are they there?" We won't mention any names-Nicole Richie.

Yesterday, on the E's Countdown to the Red Carpet special, there were a few basic rules outlined for celebrities.

• No PR stunts (swan dresses, Obama dresses, etc)
• Keep your boobs to yourself
• The dress needs to be short or tight, but NEVER both
• Don't match your eye makeup to your dress: HOKY
• With accessories: Less is more

And while, crazily enough, these rules were pretty much followed-problems did hit the red carpet. Let's face it, sometimes runway doesn't translate to red carpet. Daring pick doesn't equal fabulous. And, safe doesn't mean your safe from criticism.

There's far too much to include in one post, but it's all coming, one triumph (or one mistake) at a time...